From the get-go, Bống came in with much aplomb, offering her chè to the Sharks, who only had praises in response. She then presented her business model in front of the illustrious panel and asked for 200 million vnd ($8,700) in exchange for 20% equity.

It all started when Bống got a taste of Chè Bưởi, a Southern dessert consists of beans, tapioca starch, and pomelo pulp with a souplike consistency, in a restaurant. So enraptured by the taste and smell that cup of chè bưởi, Bống was determined to bring this delicacy closer to the hearts of Northerners. And so, she set on learning how to cook chè bưởi herself. After 15 tries, Bống finally found the right recipe. With that, Bống opened her business.

Bống admitted that initially it was hard to establish a solid ground to launch the shop since so many food and beverages shops had existed already. Bống did not want hers to have to fade into the muted background of the crowded food scene, so she conceived the brand “Chè Bưởi Bống Nấu” (“Chè Bưởi made by Bống”), hoping that it would give her shop a nice ring.The brand can now be found on Facebook, Instagram, and Youtube with thousands of followers.

Most customers of Chè Bưởi Bống nấu know about her via those social media applications, others through the good old word of mouth. All, however, can probably attest to how delicious her chè is. So delicious that one woman even drove a car to buy hundreds of cups of chè to feed her company. On average, Bống sells somewhere in the region of 100 cups per day.

On good days, a national holiday for example, Bống cooks and sells up to 400 cups of chè, amounting to 3.2 million vnd (roughly $140) in total. Along with the famous chè, Bống also sells books and toys. With this diverse business model, she quickly gained financial independence. Speaking with Little Big Shots, Bống bashfully shared that the pair of Converse she was wearing had been bought using her own money. She had also spent the money on a laptop and was looking into an Ipad Air 2 to help her learn English with more flexibility. However, ever the businesswoman, she insists on always putting 10% of her revenue into a long-term savings pocket. Then there is a pocket for necessities, another for education, one for financial freedom, and one for charity.

As school takes first precedence always, Bống runs her shop on Sundays only. Bống would wake up at 5 o’clock sharp in the morning to prepare and cook up some chè, her mom helping on the side. The profits, though, are split in a 51-49 ratio. The slightly larger portion goes to our young boss. But this is not Bống’s ultimate vision; she wants to expand the business, to go national hence her participation in Shark Tank.

As it turned out, her offer — 200 million vnd ($8,700)  for 20% equity — was taken up by Shark Thuỷ. Shark Thuỷ also sponsors 500 million vnd ($22,000) for Bống’s study in entrepreneurship and leadership in a span of 5 years. Besides, Bống will be the ambassador for Shark Thuỷ’s English language center — Apax Leaders. Shark Hưng, on the other hand, offered Bống 100 million vnd ($4,350) in return for 10% of her business. He shared that the Sharks’ investments in Bống were investments in a new form of education that is hands-on and applicable, thereby encouraging Bống to keep learning and doing what she does and loves to do.

Ms. Hạnh, Bống’s neighbor, commented:

“Bống has always been the star of the neighborhood for her immense talent and inexhaustible energy. Bống makes really delicious chè; I have some all the time.”

I hope, and am quite sure, that Bống will soon realize her dream of having a chain of shops across Vietnam. Then I too can have some of that sweet Bống – made Chè Bưởi.

The post Bống Chè Bưởi – A little girl with an entrepreneurial mindset appeared first on Maze Vietnam.

Here is the list of all the food destinations that he went to. Some of the owners in those restaurants or food stalls say that their life did take a huge milestone or a 180-degree turn for the better after being featured by Anthony Bourdain.

Bun Cha Huong Lien

What is it? Bun Cha – Grilled pork noodles
Address: 24 Le Van Huu
Opening hours: 9:00 AM – 8:30 PM
Note: You should come as early as possible to avoid the crowd and the queue. Also, if you come late, Bun Cha will run out. Only vermicelli and spring rolls available – which happened to us once. We got there at almost 8:00 PM and we ended up eating vermicelli and spring rolls without Bun Cha in a Bun Cha restaurant.

Bun Cha Huong Lien is the most famous destination in the list since it is where U.S. Former President – Obama and Bourdain ate. You can navigate your way to Le Van Huu street which is located in the Old Quarter and drop by a small restaurant fully packed with scooters on the front and lots of people coming in and out. You would know you’re in the right place by seeing all the framed pictures of Obama and Bourdain on the wall. After their visit, the restaurant amended its own menu with the addition of “Obama combo” which literally means “this is what Obama ordered” including Bun cha, beer, and seafood spring rolls, one each. Bun Cha is a bowl of grilled pork, crunchy papaya, and carrots with fish sauce accompanied by rice vermicelli and fresh herbs. Just dip some vermicelli into the bowl then take a pork bite and eat! It’s easy, just mix and take bits of everything together and eat. It’s DELICIOUS!

Cussing Noodles

What is it? Bun doc mung – Noodles with pork and taro stems
Address: 41 Ngo Sy Lien, Hanoi
Opening hours: 11:00 AM – 7:00 PM

Cussing noodles restaurant is well-known among Hanoians. Some people from other provinces of Vietnam often make jokes about the name of this restaurant and some might even be afraid of it. They make lots of questions about not only the restaurant but also the people of Hanoi, whether they are rude or not, whether they are always cussing or not, and alike. The name of this restaurant is just after the name of the dish – Bun doc mung; however, the owner always cusses at her staff, customers, and even not any specific one, which makes people call her shop “cussing noodles”. This bun doc mung shop started to become famous thanks to the word of mouth as people have been always curious “why cussing noodles? what cussing?” and they just wanted to check it out. It became more and more famous thanks to Bourdain’s visit and that it was featured on CNN, viral all over the world. But the question is how about its quality?

Bun doc mung is a bowl of noodles (same strings of Bun Cha noodles) with pork, tomatoes, and taro stems. The best thing about it is its broth made of pork knuckles and snouts. Cussing noodles shop has been doing a great job in this. People love its broth, so no matter how long the queue is and no matter how much cussing they think they would get, they still come. What’s funny is some customers even “volunteer” and desire to be cursed by the owner that they tried to make fun of her or whatever way they could think of to piss her off.

Bun Oc Pho Co

What is it? Bun Oc – Snail noodles with broth
Address: Giang Bun Oc Pho Co, 36 Luong Ngoc Quyen, Hanoi
Opening hours: 7:30 AM–3 PM, 5–11 PM

This is one of the first dishes that Bourdain had in Hanoi. Although Bun Oc is not as famous as Pho in Vietnam, it is still worth trying at least once. The broth is special; the flavor and the smell are very good. Take a seat on a little plastic stool, swirl the chopsticks around and slurp some Bun Oc like a local.

Bia Hai Xom (Beer)   

What is it? Beers
Address: Bia Hai Xom chain is everywhere. But Bourdain went to 22 Tang Bat Ho, Hanoi.
Opening hours: 10 AM–11:30 PM

Beer is everywhere in Vietnam and the number of beer consumers in Vietnam ranks on the up-top in the world. If you can drink or even can’t but want to see some party vibes and Vietnamese ways to clink the glasses, just come check out Bia Hai Xom – the most popular beer shop chain in Vietnam. You will see all the people around shout out cheerfully like crazy, counting from 3 to 1 and “Dzo”. You say “Cheers”. The Vietnamese say “Dzo” and “Uong” – “Drink”.

Banh Xeo Dinh Cong Trang

What is it? Banh Xeo – Vietnamese pancake
Address: 46A Dinh Cong Trang, Tan Dinh Ward, District 1, HCMC (Saigon)
Opening hours: 10 AM – 2 PM / 4 PM – 9 PM

This Banh Xeo shop has become popular since Anthony Bourdain’s first visit which literally changed the shop’s destiny and life forever positively. Banh Xeo Dinh Cong Trang offers a perfect version of Vietnam’s Southern pancake – Banh Xeo. The fried crust is made of rice flour, water, and turmeric powder, while what’s inside is full of pork, shrimp, herbs, scallions, and bean sprouts. If you are a vegetarian, you can tell the owner to exclude all the meats. Banh Xeo Dinh Cong Trang uses firewood to make the pancake, which makes the crust crunchy and the whole cake itself smell and taste better. You can eat Banh Xeo with your hands or chopsticks. Dip your Banh Xeo into a bowl of fish sauce and take a bite!

Bun Bo Hue The Lunch Lady

What is it? Bun Bo Hue – Hue style noodles
Address: 23 Hoang Sa Street, Phuong Da Kao, District 1, HCMC (Saigon) or Hem D Chung Cu Nguyen Dinh C, Da Kao, District 1, HCMC (Saigon)
Opening hours: 11 AM – 3:30 PM

One of the most famous street food stalls in Saigon belongs to the legendary, also the street food celebrity – the Lunch Lady or Nguyen Thi Thanh. Anthony Bourdain found her stall and had some delicious noodles that he featured on his show No Reservations. It made this food stall become famous and popular all over the world day by day just after his visit; however, her name was and is still always well-known for her noodles and broth among the locals in Saigon. What’s interesting about this food stall is the way the Lunch Lady rotates her menu which serves only one type of noodle soup or broth every day just because she is an expert in that. Seven days in a week, she can walk you through a maze of noodles’ collection from Bun Bo Hue, Bun Thai (Thai’s noodles?), Bun Mam (Fish sauce noodles) to Banh Canh Cua (Crab noodles). If you visit on Friday, you will be served Bun Bo Hue in which you slurp some clear broth with a meaty flavor and chew on thick noodles while eating some meats, herbs, and rolls.

Cao Lau Hoi An

What is it? Cai Lau – Hoi An Noodles without broth
Address: Central Market in Hoi An

Cao Lau is a Hoi An signature that nobody should ever miss it when they are in Hoi An. Bourdain had Cao Lau in the Central Market, Hoi An where there are a large number of food vendors and restaurants offering delicious Central Vietnam cuisine. Cao Lau has thin slices of pork, thick Quang noodles, and all the fresh herbs and vegetables. If you travel to Central Vietnam without eating Cao Lau in Hoi An and My Quang in Da Nang, you’re not really in town.

Others

The above list is just to map out some signatures. To check the full food list by Anthony Bourdain, you can check the gallery below. Click on the photo for a bigger size and use the arrow to navigate. Feel free to give us your thoughts or feedback on these food destinations!

More articles about Food in Hanoi and Food in Saigon. 

The post Recreate Anthony Bourdain’s Food Adventure in Vietnam appeared first on Maze Vietnam.

I had a chance to visit uncle Son’s farm, known as SonPacamara Coffee Farm in Da Lat, Viet Nam. Although my trip just lasted for two days, I do think it is really valuable to me with a lot of knowledge and practical experience absorbed.

At about 7 pm, I arrived at Dalat by coach, then I had to take the grab from parking place to the provincial civic center. After that, Mr. Son picked me up and headed to his private house, where I met some passionate guys who had a strong passion for coffee like me. After having dinner with his family, we had some heart-to-heart talks together. Then, a volunteer took me to the farm where I would stay through the workshop. Dalat by night was indeed cold, but the beauty of this small city was totally dominated it. I could feel the fierce wind blowing heavily, but it seems like Dalat people lived in harmony with it. On the farm, we broiled the sweet potatoes and then enjoyed sound sleeps after a long journey.

Broiled sweet potatoes and exchanged some talks

In the first day, I waked up early in the morning as usual as to taste the fog as well as the fresh air which proves to be unique here. Moreover, the cables decorated with wine bottles were used in a creative way to deliver coffee bags. At 6:30 a.m, we enjoyed some coffee before having breakfast with noodles. At 7:30 a.m, Mr. Son, some volunteers, and all the participants came to the farm and prepared carefully for each process. Firstly, they have introduced the entire schedule of morning activities, including some basic knowledge of coffee trees. Then at 8 p.m, Mr. Dung – a volunteer here showed us about 4 coffee varieties: Pacamara, Typica, Bourbon, and Mundo Novo. He talked about some typical characteristics of each type in terms of the brands, leaves, seeds, and aromas. After the introduction of certain varieties, we could ask him and Mr. Son more to achieve a deeper understanding of each variety. Next, at about 9:30 a.m, Mr. Oanh – also a volunteer here mentioned the process of grinding and brewing. It is also an important step for aromatic compounds to release and open the coffee to oxidation. There are four coffee processing methods: Natural, Honey, Semi-washed, and Fully-washed. Then at 11 a.m, we took a short rest and had lunch.

The cables

Early morning in Da Lat

Fully-washed processing method

At 13:30 p.m, we continued to learn about the coffee dripping process, which I considered to be really complicated. This step requires you to divide coffee to the exact ratio, measure exactly the amount of boiling water and coffee powder as well as how to pour cleverly. Firstly, we gathered together in the bar room, then Mr. Dat – a coffee shop owner showed us a few personal tips to make a perfect coffee cup as well as some marketing strategies. Next, we were separated into four groups and took part in a small competition about dripping. Actually, there were a handful of baristas so that their performances were extremely interesting. After each individual completed making one cup, the remaining teams had the opportunities to taste that coffee and voted for the more deserving one. Ultimately, the winning team was rewarded with specialty coffee bags. During the night, we had dinner with chicken buffet composing of toasted and boiled chickens. Then, some songs accompanied by guitar were performed, and it also put an end to the first day.

Mr. Dat is sharing his personal experience about dripping

In the second day, it turned out to be less freezing than the first one, everybody gathered again in the bar room to hear Mr. Son’s talk about the detailed information of each variety, then he showed us some ways to recognize the common features of each bean. Next, we had time to learn about coffee defects such as malformed beans, over-fermented beans, insect-damaged beans, … After that, we sat in a group and looked carefully to find the damaged beans. After a while, Mr. Son shared with us steps of roasting coffee, and then we practiced to roast the bourbon beans with the help of some volunteers. In my perspective, if you are a newbie, you will find it a bit annoying because of the heat, odor and limited space. This process accounted for around 2 hours. Then we had lunch and relaxed.

4 types of powders of specialty coffee

At 13:30 p.m, we continued to appreciate the roasted coffee towards six points: Aroma, Acidity, Body, Flavor, Aftertaste, and Balance, and then we calculated the total points to decide which team would win. Everyone tried to concentrate on this cupping process to give accurate results.

Cupping method

Finally, at 5 p.m, the workshop officially ended.

Then at 6 p.m, I took the grab again back to parking station and headed out to Buon Ma Thuot city. Interestingly, I run into a nice grabber, and thus he told me a lot about fabulous violet, the climate which is considered to be exclusive here. Then he drove me to a famous Banh Canh eatery. Ultimately, I got on the coach at 7 p.m.

Da Lat in the afternoon!

Last, thank you, everyone, for your warmness and willing-to-share ideas. Hope to see you guys again!

Special thanks to Mr. Son for helping me a lot in this workshop. In my opinion, he is such a passionate, knowledgeable and kind man. If you want to immerse yourself in a coffee environment, contact him!

All photos provided by Dang Tuan Anh

We take a moment to thank Dang Tuan Anh for contributing his article. If you have a story to tell, please feel free to join us at

https://www.mazevietnam.com/join-us/

The post A trip to one of Vietnam’s Great Coffee Farms appeared first on Maze Vietnam.

His most eye-catching designs are the geometrically shaped animal shelves. “That bird there is one of my favorites”, says Olivier when he sits down, “it’s very simple, very pure.” But its apparent simplicity is the result of deep thought and careful planning. “Birds are a part of human nature, they are found all over the world and in many cultures, they play an important role – often as a symbol of freedom or peace.”

Universal
Olivier speaks calmly and chooses his words wisely. He is not a man of exaggerations or superlatives, not as a person and not in his work: “I’m not interested in creating highly conceptual pieces of art that no-one understands. Many designers make their work too complicated, they need too many words to explain it”. His fuss-free designs, on the other hand, are for everyone: “I want to make furniture that people can use and at the same time makes them dream, from a 5-year old girl to 90-year old grandpa”.

Impact
He’s very fond of the more complicated rhino design too, in many ways the exact opposite of the light-footed bird. “The rhino is an ancient, strong and massive beast – it has been on earth since prehistoric times. To me, it represents Africa, where the roots of humanity lie. The rhino is now critically endangered; I don’t like preaching, but I do hope that my designs will inspire people, especially children, to be more responsible citizens”.

Nature
Beside the bird and rhino, Olivier created a dog and an elephant. “Young kids, no matter where they from, are fascinated by animals. Some people might lose that connection later in their life, but the point is that we all once had it.” The natural world is a big source of inspiration for the Olivier: “To me, design is about an emotional connection, not about words. It’s about the vital energy that creates animals, forests, mountains, oceans. It’s so magic, peaceful, so inspiring for us as humans. I’m trying to share that spirit through my creations.”

Resilience
Olivier makes more products: tables, for example, and smaller items like ceramic vases and jars made from cinnamon wood. All with the same distinct, elegant simplicity and a story behind it. The Ki vases, for example, were inspired by the old Japanese saying ‘nanakorobi-yaoki’, meaning ‘falling down seven times, standing up eight’, and the roly-poly dolls that originated from that thought. Olivier: “The Japanese created lucky-charm figurines with a round bottom, they are a bit wobbly, but when you push them down, they always return to their original position. That idea talks to everyone: no matter how hard and difficult life can be, we all have this strong inner energy to get through hard times and rise again”. The designer took away the folkloristic aspects of the figures and created the Ki (which means: soul or tree) vases. “I put bonsai trees in them, since they’re also about vital energy and growth, no matter the bounds. But of course, everyone is free to use the vases as they wish.”

Timeless
Olivier’s goal is to make his products as simple and pure as they can be. “I’m not designing items that last for five years. My dream is to create pieces that people want to keep forever, and that are passed down from generation to generation. That’s why I stay away from trends.” This ideal results in timeless pieces that balance aesthetics and function: “The space on the shelves is quite limited, for example, so you have to think about the most precious things you want to display there. Less is more!”

Contrast
The contemporary designs form an interesting contrast to Zuzu’s historical interior, but Olivier hasn’t designed them specifically for space. “I try to create pieces that look good in many different places: from a big loft in New York, or a traditional house in Japan, to a small house in the French countryside or a traditional Vietnamese house like Zuzu. To me, a well-designed product should fit in many different places and not in just one.”

Method
The designer’s high standards also apply to the making process in which he’s closely involved. “Coming up with a concept is one thing, but knowing how to produce it, is a something completely different. I want to be able to make things on my own or with a few craftsmen in a workshop. That’s what I realized during my studies and especially from working with furniture designers like Piet Hein Eek.” Olivier works with different locally produced materials such as wood, steel, and ceramics from Bat Trang.

Vietnam
Six years ago, after graduating from the Parisian School of Art and Design (ENSAAMA), Olivier found a job in Vietnam and fell in love with the country and its craftsmen: “I arrived in Vietnam by chance, but I was so inspired by the traditional lifestyle and the family workshops, especially in Hanoi, that I decided to stay.” Despite his love for the north, he moved to HCMC. “In Saigon, I find the contrast between the old quarters and the new buildings very interesting. You can feel the country is changing.”

The designer has no plans to leave Vietnam anytime soon, he focuses on further developing his work here: “I would like to expand my collection of small products and I’m looking forward to experimenting with different materials, such as concrete or scrap wood from local factories. And I want to focus more on interior design. To me, designing the space around an object is very exciting too!”

Zuzu offers Olivier Polmanss the perfect location to show his wonderful work to a wide audience. Curious? Go have a look and don’t forget to enjoy the peaceful garden.

Photographer: Brice Godard

Brice Godard (33) is a French filmmaker and photographer, based in Vietnam. He works together with other artists, and for clients such as Paris Match, Unilever, Coca-Cola, T3 Architects and Saigoneer. www.bricegodard.com

Writter: Annigje Jacobs

Annigje Jacobs (34) is a Dutch (copy)writer, based in Saigon. She works all over the region for international brands, ngo’s and magazines. www.annig.je/portfolio

The Furniture Designer: Olivier Polmanss
Address:48A Tran Ngoc Dien, Thao Dien, District 2, HCMC, Vietnam
Phone: (+84) 09 01 12 54 02
Website: www.zuzuconceptstore.com
Opening hours: Tuesday to Friday, from 9 am to 6pm

Big Thanks to Olivier, Brice, and Annigje for contributing this awesome article to Maze Vietnam!

To submit your own story, or want us to write your story, please contact: mazevietnam.info@gmail.com
Let’s share the world your Vietnam story!

The post The Creative Journey of a French Furniture Designer in Vietnam appeared first on Maze Vietnam.

It tastes fresh like freshly squeezed orange juice.

But first let me introduce us to you. We are 2 students from Switzerland who travelled for 2 months through Asia in winter 2017. Our first destination in Vietnam was Saigon and then went north until we ended up in the busy but lovely capital city of Vietnam – Hanoi.

We stayed in an Airbnb near the beautiful old quarter. Like real tourists, we checked what we should do in Hanoi. On several blogs, we read about the Bia Hoi Hanoi which is the cheapest beer on earth with 40 Cent per beer. But the most fascinating fact about the Bia Hoi Hanoi is not only the price but also the circumstance that it is brewed in the morning and sold in the afternoon. We even didn’t know that this is possible. That’s why we decided that we must try this unique beer.

On our second day in the city we visited the famous clothes market called Đồng-Xuân-Market. There we got this funny snapshot.

After we visited this impressive market we walked back home. On our way to the Airbnb we had to cross the old quarter and then in a very busy street we noticed a sign “Bia Hoi Hanoi”. So, we decided spontaneously to get one beer to find out how it tastes and then to go back home because we felt not very well. The place was already really crowded with locals although it was just 4 pm. We sat down on these famous little plastic chairs and ordered 2 Bia Hoi Hanoi. Within less than 1 minute the beers were on our table. We both needed just one sip to get a big fan of this beer.

For sure you can’t compare Bia Hoi Hanoi with a normal beer. The taste is not that strong like the one of a classic beer, it tastes fresh like freshly squeezed orange juice. Already before our glasses were empty we had another 2 beers on our table albeit we didn’t order them. But we had that much fun in this place that we decided to stay and to drink them and it went on like this. With every beer, we got into a better discussion about our trip, politics, and beer. Somewhen in the evening, a Russian couple joined us. We didn’t know them, but we had some pretty interesting discussion about the world and the relationship between Russia and Europe. And because of social media, we still stay in touch till now. 10 pm the place was already more or less empty. Just we and the Russian couple plus the owner and the staff were left. Furthermore, they told us that they ran out of the Bia Hoi Hanoi beer. That’s why we decided to go back home. Then we got the bill and realized that we (just me and my friend) had 32 beers! So, each of us had 16 beers. For all beers together, we paid less than 14 USD. In Switzerland, you pay for one beer roughly 5 USD. After we settled the bill we said goodbye to Russians and walked home. Normally that would be just a 20-minute walk. But we needed more than 2 hours. I’m sure that you can imagine how we walked. After we made it to our beds we slept for the next whole day. It was one of our highlights in Vietnam. I really recommend you to try the Bia Hoi Hanoi its worthy.

Words and photos by Adrian Willi

Drink some beers in Hanoi’s famous beer street!

Ta Hien – Beer Street in Hanoi

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The post 2 Guys, 32 Beers, 14 USD appeared first on Maze Vietnam.

Day 1

How did we get our Vietnamese Dong?

Where did we go?

THIS IS WHERE WE GOT SCAMMED!

Then after that, we did not have any choice but to take a cab going to Hanoi Opera House as it was far from this temple. BUT we still considered the fact that the taxi drivers would cheat us. We were walking around the streets again then the two locals we’ve asked earlier were near us and APPROACHED us again if we needed their help. Good thing they are super nice and helpful that they offered us to book a GRAB car to be able to reach the next destination. That’s the smartest and biggest help he had done to us!!!! Thanks God, there are still nice people on earth His name is Nguyen Minh Duong! Thanks Duong! He lives in Saigon but their work just allocated them in Hanoi for a week.

DAY 2

The post Vietnam at a Glance! Our Hanoi Itinerary and Travel Tips | Vietnam Travel Story appeared first on Maze Vietnam.

When it comes to a long-distance relationship, most of us get frustrated and say it does not work. It happens when texts and calls are everything. Phones and computers become our life, and we may spend a lot of time feeling sorry for ourselves to some extent. However, it is true that nothing but distance can really test a relationship. Long distance strengthens a relationship. An explicit example of this is a couple of two beautiful lovebirds living halfway across the world from each other – Vanessa and Hoang Anh. After all the ups and downs of a long-distance relationship, they eventually created a happy ending called marriage!

To discover this beautiful love story, let’s talk with Vanessa!

Could you please tell us about yourself and your husband?

My name is Vanessa. I’m 30 and I am a French woman. My native language is French. I was born and raised in Paris, but since my mom used to work for the French Embassy, we moved around quite a bit. I got to live in Singapore and Vietnam (both Hanoi and Saigon) for a few years during the 90’s. Vietnam in the past is quite different from now, if not a lot! As of now, I have been living in Hanoi since 2011. I work as a copy editor for the French-speaking weekly magazine Le Courrier du Vietnam. I’m also a French teacher and a freelance translator.

My husband’s name is Hoang Anh, he’s Vietnamese and so is his native tongue. He did spend a few years in Canada so his English is really good, even better than mine. We speak what we amusingly call “Vietlish” together *smiles*. He’s a reporter for an English speaking daily newspaper.

Could you share your “How we met” story with us? 

I met and fell for my boyfriend (now husband) in 2009. He’s from Hanoi and I was living in France and the UK back then. I was finishing my degree in Paris Sorbonne and later teaching French in Manchester for the British Council. We were doing long distance by then. After my year in Manchester, I was planning on doing my Master Degree in French literature and linguistics in Paris. So that meant, another 2 years of long distance! Our future together seemed then quite blurry and full of uncertainties to say the least. So Hoang Anh (that’s his name) did spend quite some time doing research on the Internet to look for a University in Hanoi suited for my Master degree. And against all odds, he did succeed and found me just that. That’s the story of why I came to Hanoi in the first place. I was only planning on staying 2 years (lol). Certainly, I was lying to myself but that was the actual plan. Until life, love and other factors decided otherwise.

How long have you been together?

We fell for each other in 2009, so it has been 8 years. We got married in 2013 after 4 years of relationship (2 years of which were long distance and 2 others were cheesy dating and of living together)

What have been the most memorable moments in your relationship with him?

The very moment immortalized here was during the summer of 2009, on my last day of vacation in Hanoi. After spending over two months in the city I was about to leave back to Paris.

Back then we had a very close group of friends and we would go out, party and travel with the gang during the whole summer. So, on my last day, before heading to the airport, I was inconsolable and couldn’t stop crying. Hoàng Anh then, drove me around the city. He took me to a nice little corner of town, under the shade of a  hoa giấy tree. He then took a flower and put it in my hair and said: “One year is going to fly very quickly you’ll see. You should be happy with the idea of coming back! I’ll be here, I ain’t going anywhere. But please stop crying. I hate to see you sad”. Believe it or not but I knew then and there that I was going to spend the rest of my life with this guy. I’ve had never been so sure about anything else in my life before. I did not know how or when it was going to happen, I simply knew it would. I would marry him and grow old with him.

And now, here we are 8 years later. Together in that same city where we fell in love. Against all odds. In spite of the distance, the obstacles, and the cultural differences. Here we are. And not just the two of us anymore because we got a baby!

Also, one of the funniest and romantic moments of our relationship was when he proposed to me. I really did not expect him to do it. It was a family outing, my family. Like. My entire family, from my mom side. You know. My grandparents, my uncles, my aunties, my cousins. Even my mom, who lives in France, and my brother, who lives in Saigon were there. Everybody was. We hired a van and went a little bit out of town to that amazing restaurant with a fountain and gorgeous garden with flowers and bamboos and stuff. After lunch, we all came out and sat in the garden to drink tea and eat cakes. It was really great. The weather was glorious, sunny and windy. My husband was very jumpy and seemed agitated. I asked him if he was feeling OK. He stood up and sat down a bunch of times before he finally told me: “I’m about to do something stupid”. I didn’t really understand until he, then, IN FRONT OF MY ENTIRE FAMILY, started to kneel down. I couldn’t believe in my eyes and started laughing with tears coming out. He then asked me in Vietnamese “Nu oi, lay anh nhe?” (Nu is my house name and Tit is his). I kneeled as well and said “Oui!”. Everybody was cheering, laughing but also crying. It was very emotional. I will never forget that moment and cherish it always. I always thought that if he’d propose, he’d go for a more cheesy approach. A romantic dinner just the two of us or something. Oh boy, I was in for a surprise. He later told me he was actually carrying the ring in his pocket for weeks, waiting for the perfect moment. He never really felt the right moment until that day. The setting was beautiful and I was surrounded by my loved ones. “I couldn’t think of a more perfect moment”, he later told me.

When you two were together, how did your and his family react to this cross-cultural relationship and then marriage?

I think any Vietnamese mothers always wish deep down that their sons marry a good Vietnamese girl. I don’t blame them. And although it has never been brought up directly, I had a sense that maybe things weren’t too awesome from his family’s side at first. Maybe some people thought it was just a fling with a ”Gai Tay”, that it’ll pass, that he’ll settle for a Vietnamese woman in the end anyway. And then, 1 year passes, 2 years pass, then 3 and more. With time I got to learn to know his family and him and vice versa. My mother in law is an amazing woman. She’s great with me and we’ve been getting along for years now. I call her ”me” (mom) with pleasure.
My family absolutely adores him, both from my mom’s side here but also from my dad’s side back in Paris and Marseille. We went to France last Christmas for him to meet my family. It was the first time for him but also for our daughter, who was 4 months old at the time! Of course in France, there’s the language barrier as nobody speaks English (welcome to France – no comment) but Hoang Anh is learning French so it was very nice.

Prior to meeting your husband, had you ever dated anyone from a different culture? What differences would you find between Asian (Vietnamese) and Western men as well as Asian and Western customs/cultures?

I have to specify that my mother is also Vietnamese, therefore I am not completely unfamiliar with the culture here, the traditions, even the language to some extension. But as a teenager, I remember always telling myself and swearing myself three things.

1) Never dating Vietnamese men.

2) Never getting involved in long distance relationships

3) Never getting married.

Prior to meeting Hoang Anh, I only dated Frenchmen. As I said, I never expected to be dating a Vietnamese man! Haha. So let’s just say I hit the Jackpot with Hoang Anh!

I guess the main difference is that Vietnamese men consider family as being a big part and a big priority in their life. I cannot speak for all Vietnamese men since I have only been with Hoang Anh, but he sure is, more thoughtful, caring and mature than most Western men I dated in the past.

Have you two ever had any cross-cultural miscommunications? 

Since my mom is Vietnamese, I can speak it quite fluently now actually, I have been taking writing and reading lessons since I moved here in 2011. Forcing myself to read a lot, anything on the Internet really. But still, Vietnamese isn’t my mother tongue and my husband just loves to make fun of me when I mispronounce stuff. He says I sound like a kid. One time, back when I just moved here, around early 2011, we were together on his bike, driving around town and I was feeling hungry. I saw a sign on a shop that says “Sua chua”. So I was like awesome! Let’s stop for yogurt, I’m craving for some. He didn’t say anything and let me go to the shop first. It didn’t look right. Like at all. It was dirty and smelly and there were tools and bikes in pieces everywhere. I didn’t think much of it since some shops and cafes can be hidden in tiny alleys sometimes. I asked one of the guy: “Em oi, sua chua o dau?” (where’s the yoghurt?) and he just stared at me, speechless. When I turned to Hoang Anh, he was laughing so hard he had to sit down on the pavement. When I read the sign again, it said “Sua chua xe may” (bike repairs!). Accentuation is everything in Vietnam, I learned it the hard way. Ok, Sữa chua is yogurt but Sửa chữa is repair!

As you two are from different countries, so we are curious about your wedding. Could you please tell us about it?

The plan was to have 2 weddings, ideally in Vietnam and in France. Turned out we ended only having it here. It’s a bit of a shame but we then decided to celebrate our 5th wedding anniversary in France to make up for it.

Our wedding took place in Hanoi and it was super traditional. Oh gee did we have a ton of ceremonies! One of them is the An Hoi (Ăn hỏi) where basically the groom and his family come to the bride’s house to officially asks for her hand. It was beautiful, the “bê tráp” ceremony means carrying tons of goodies (offerings if you will), the setting and decor was super nice and I got to wear so many different dresses and áo dài! I was most stressed out about that crucial part where the bride has to serve the tea to the guests. Oh boy. I was shaking so much and all eyes were on me! I nailed that part though and the hubby discretely high fived me.

I have to say that I enjoyed all of the ceremonies, it was very traditional, sometimes even cheesy but we incorporated some French traditions into the Vietnamese ones : My dad walked me down the aisle, the bride and the groom gave a speech, the married couple did an opening waltz and we had a ring ceremonial, (and when asked THE question, he answered in French “Oui, je le veux” and I answered in Vietnamese “Vang, toi dong y”).

Talk about some of the responsibilities or changes you might not have been ready for before marriage and how you coped with them in marriage?

Actually, a lot of people have been asking me how married life is… Thing is, we already were living together for years before getting married so no surprises. I know it’s not something very common in Vietnam to do. It is kinda frowned upon, especially for girls. But Hoang Anh and I have always been on the same page when it comes to love, commitment, marriage, responsibilities, and life in general. I’m really glad I found someone like him.

How do you incorporate both of your cultures into your day-to-day life together?

Through food haha. Jokes aside, yeah one day we can be eating a typical thit kho (Vietnamese Caramelized Pork Belly) or thit luoc (Boilded pork), rau muong (Ipomoea aquatica Vegetables) with tons of com (Rice) and the next day we’ll be eating pasta blue cheese sauce with steak and French wine. Also through art, we both like French music and movies as well as some Vietnamese movies and music. We share our cultures with each other and now, to our daughter as well. It’s very enriching. And of course, through language, I’m still learning Vietnamese words and expression every day and so is he with French.

How did you incorporate both cultures into upbringing?

We have a little baby girl, she’s almost 14 months and she’s the absolute best (in all objectivity). I speak to her in French and his dad speaks to her in Vietnamese. Her first word was “mom” in Vietnamese! Her (limited) vocabulary is mostly Vietnamese because of her environment but she understands both and “communicates” in both languages. All of the songs and stories I sing or read to her are in French though. When she’ll be of age, she’ll certainly go to the French school here.

Do you have any future plans or dreams with him that you would like to share with us?

We often speak about when we’ll grow old, where we would live. We both joke about how we’ll buy a house in Hoi An by the beach and open a cafe and French bakery. Or maybe buying a villa in South of France. Dream on! But who knows.

I highly appreciate the time that Vanessa spent with me sharing her true love story. My team – Maze Vietnam and I would like to take a moment to thank her very much!

How about our readers? Are you ready to give it a try? Are you ready to head all the way from up to the North through the Central then down to the South to find a Vietnamese partner?

To have your story published on our website, please pm Facebook us or email to mazevietnam.info@gmail.com

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The post From A Long-Distance Relationship to A Happy Marriage | From France to Vietnam appeared first on Maze Vietnam.

“My life’s most unworldly aspiration is to prove to the world that Vietnamese food is the best.”

Luke was first known by so many Vietnamese people when he first appeared as a professional judge in MasterChef Vietnam – the first season in 2013. He often appears in a poised and immaculate look, covering himself in a black suit, with the neatly in-shaped hair, and the grave-looking pair of glasses. He is an inspiring chef and his life is a long story worth telling. 

In 1978, Thailand refugee camp gave its welcome to a new born, the little boy Luke Nguyen. When children of his age were born in more decent houses, his only haven was just a refugee camp, no more. He then followed his family all the way to Australia. To earn for their living as well as to take care of the family, his parents decided to open a Vietnamese restaurant called ‘Phở Cây Dù’ (Phở Umbrella) in Cabramatta, Fairfield. Havin grown up with the smell of foods, with the sound of pots and pans and the heat from the stoves, he seemed to be inspired and at the same time, his love for cooking was then lighten up by the kitchen fire. At the age of 5, he was taught to cook by his father.

“When I was 5, my father taught me to cook. At that time, what I learned was Phở soup. That was also my worst failure because the way of seasoning was unappetizing. From that time on, I have learned that I will never let anyone taste my foods if they have not been carefully seasoned.”

And by the time he was 14, after revealing his true passion for cooking to his parents, he was sent to Sydney to work as a kitchen staff in big restaurants of the city. After 9 years, he finally opened his very own restaurant with the help of his sister at the age of 23, the notorious Red Lantern in Surry Hills, Sydney as we know today. But apparently, success is not just granted as a wish from a magical fairy tale. At the time of establishment, there were no more than 40 seats in the restaurant. And there were ups and downs, and sometimes bills were thrown over along with hundreds of pending orders from the customers.

“There were days when the restaurant became your house and working for almost 100 hours a week became part of your life”

After 5 years of his extremely and intensively hard working, struggling and putting all the efforts along with building credibility, he has forever changed his life. The Red Lantern, 4 years in a row, from 2006, was nominated as ‘The best Asian and Vietnamese restaurant in Australia’. But it seems that this success is nothing compared to his life’s aspiration of putting the name Vietnam on the map of cuisine. Though not a perfectionist, he is surely an achiever. Working and trying all his best to achieve the goals in life have become his lifetime’s companions. In the process of those nonstop efforts, in 2008, he was given the title ‘The most successful young Vietnamese Merchant in Australia’ and worthily had the honour of receiving the ‘Restaurant and Catering Ethnic Business Award’.

He is not solely a chef but also an artist, a writer and a storyteller who always knows how to refresh himself and brings a little bit of surprise in the pocket for his every come-back. During his life-long career of almost 26 years, he has been his own memory keeper and a storyteller for each of the land that he passed through and the experiences he has got. In 2007, the book Secrets of the Red Lantern: Stories and Vietnamese recipes from the heart was published as a share of his old days building up Red Lantern’s reputation, enclosed with wonderful Vietnamese recipes which he brought in “from the heart”. It feels like he writes as much as he cooks, and of course, his books are as good as the foods he makes. From 2009 to 2017, he wrote so many, such as The Song of Sapa (2009), Indochine: The Collection (2011), The Food of Vietnam (2013), Luke Nguyen’s Greater Mekong (2013), From China to Vietnam (2015) and the most recent Street Food Asia (2017). And of all the books he wrote which we have just listed, five of which from 2007 to 2017, except for From China to Vietnam, were the best sellers around Asia for cookery books.

He is both a great teacher and a great learner. He travels to learn and learn from the least of things, from the most simplistic and ordinary human beings and things around and the most usual slices of life. He discovers and finds his own cuisine from all the places he goes to. He puts all these things down to stories and without the least hesitation to share to the world.

“A chef is like a storyteller, you must deliver the message but at the same time create a tempting feeling for your dish.”

Cooking has never been a career to him but more like a journey of finding all beauties in life, in different recipes, in all the ingredients, all the ways of making and all the types of foods. This may also be the answer for his love for traveling here and there. 

“Traveling is also my passion. I don’t know what my life will be if I don’t travel.”

He enjoys traveling to all the new lands for the first purpose of discovering new foods, new cultures and new stories. Turkey, Cambodia, Egypt, France, etc and all the lands that he has set foot to leave an unforgettable mark in his life. He loves street food that much though parents are the ones who have the strongest impact on him. There is no suprise when a Vietnamese likes street food because Vietnam is indeed a street food’s kingdom of all kinds.

“It doesn’t need to be too finical because all of my inspirations come from the streets in the combination with the best ingredients. And the most important thing is telling a stories through each dish.”

While writing the stories, Luke Nguyen’s Greater Meking, he used to make his journey to the far away delta just to explore Vietnamese cuisine.

“I discover that all the foods in the streets leave a strong impression. They are simple but really decious. For example, mixing girdle cake (bánh tráng trộn) is a perfect combination of rice noodles, green mangoes, dried shrimps, beef jerky, fried shallots, roasted groundnuts, quail eggs, onion oil, chilli sauce and a lot of different types of Vietnamese mint vegetables. This is absolutely fantastic but only costs you 10.000 dong!”

He loves the country, its people and his Vietnamese bloodline just as much as he loves Vietnamese cuisine. He wants to show the world that not only do America, England and Australia have master chefs but here in Vietnam, we also have true master chefs, the best ones offering the best Vietnamese food.

“In Australia, everyone knows about Chinese food and Thai food. I want to draw their attention to Vietnamese cuisine and tell them that Vietnamese food is also good, Vietnam’s sceneries are also beautiful and Vietnamese people are also decent. My life’s most unworldly aspiration is to prove to the world that Vietnamese food is the best.”

But he does not only want foreign people to know more and to love Vietnamese food more but he also wants Vietnamese people do, especially the young peopl. For that reason, he once gave his advice to those who want to start-up in the cooking career:

“First, you must know which path you will take, what kind of chef you will be, what style of cooking is yours. Then, you must choose one from thousands of restaurants the one you will work hard for from 4 – 10 years. Last but not least, beside love and passion, you must be absolutely perservering and sometimes accept working without being paid.”

In all those years of working as an outstanding chef, a great businessman and a wonderful inspirer, he must have many things to share. But it will probably take all day, maybe months and years to truly be a listener and to understand them all. However, for those who have an immense passion for cooking, he has not forgot to leave them these four pieces of advice that we would like to call ‘Luke’s Four Golden Rules’.

“Firstly, you must have a certain indulgence in cooking. But just indulgence is not enough, you must also have a great amount of knowledge about cooking and remember not to be distracted by any factors. Secondly, you must spend approximately 4-10 years working in the restaurants. Thirdly, and very important, you must never, ever stop processing and cooking even for one day. And last but not least, you must prepare yourself to work even for 15 hours a day.”

Luke is always craving for happiness and enjoying the little things.

“I believe, success comes when you are truyly contented with yourself. The most successful ones that I have met during my journey all live in backward villages on Vietnamese mountainous areas. They take care of their fields, eat their organic vegetables and have little money. But when you look at the way they smile, you can see the success that they have got. They are contented with themselves and happy with what they have.”

Well, until now, Luke is still doing his jobs successfully as a chef, a teacher, and an inspirer. Apart from running his business, he still continues his teaching in the Grain Cooking Studio – a cooking school that has been his dream since youth. His television shows are still being broadcasted around the world and especially Luke Nguyen Street Food Asia show has been to total of 160 countries. And of course, we cannot forget to mention his Little Lantern Foundation which he set up in 2009 to help poor children to participate in career orientation of internationalized hotels and restaurants.

Our loyal readers, we should have the bravery to find your true passion even if it may take time and hard work. But who knows, maybe the world will see another Luke Nguyen. 

The story of Luke Nguyen may end here for now. What is your story? Share with us at mazevietnam.info@gmail.com

The post From A Vietnamese Refugee to a Celebrity Chef | Real Story appeared first on Maze Vietnam.

God knows how I love Hanoi, hence the move from my beloved city of Manila to here. But for once in my life, I was more than willing to give up my love for Hanoi, its vibe, its lakes, its richness in culture and the company of my friends to be with “cung.” How did it all happen? Are you sure you wanna know? It’s going to be a long anecdote but if you have time to spare, I’m opening my heart to share these few memories with you.

Let’s start from the beginning. The first time I fell in love with Hanoi was during the summer of 2014. That time, I visited Hanoi with my then girlfriend (Filipina) of almost 6 years. After a week of exploring the Vietnamese capital, I immediately thought that one day, I’ll come back to stay longer. I really liked this idea, but she didn’t. She didn’t like Hanoi for any reason. Come 2015, I am ready to try my luck in Hanoi, to live in another city on my own for the first time. Few months before the big move though, I had one of the biggest turning points in my life –she left me. Fast forward to a few months later, I found myself in Hanoi with a new life. I finally accepted the fact that we were not meant to be together and I opened myself up to the idea of dating local girls.

So this is how it begins. Compared to Philippines capital, Manila, Hanoi is very traditional. Most of the girls here, if not all are controlled by their family, traditions, and society’s expectations. It was really hard to find a lesbian girl to date. Why? Because it is so hard to know, “gaydar” doesn’t work for Vietnamese “les.” Most people even confuse lesbian as just “butch” or else, you’re a “bis” or bisexual –at least in the North because HCMC’s lesbian scene is another story. The “manual search” for someone to date is a little difficult for me so I went to the “digital” route. Using dating apps like Tinder, Badoo, LesPark, HER, and whatever app I can download just so I can digitally meet and get to know some Vietnamese girls. Sure, there are a lot of girls in Vietnam who has active “online life” but it is not easy to search with filters such as: must be lesbian, must speak English, should live in Hanoi and so on. It was really difficult but I luckily managed to find some people to talk to, I’ve met some, kept in touch with some and some of them even if we didn’t date, they became my friends. One even became my roommate!
Now here goes the part you might be waiting for—my dating experience(s). Let me enumerate them because each person was a unique experience.

The Master
The 1st Viet girl I really liked was “ba chu.” I call her master, she calls me “slave”. We met January of 2016 when I welcomed a new life for myself. Although there was a language barrier, in the beginning, we were able to communicate, special thanks to Google Translate.

We met through a lesbian app, we chat all the time we can and one day out of my curiosity and eagerness to meet her, I came to her workplace unannounced. As I come there, all she was able to say in the first few minutes were my name and “(I am) shy.” We didn’t really talk much, because we couldn’t.

She was extremely shy, she cannot say a word and I just really came to see her. I don’t want to bother her so I just asked for another time to meet and I was so happy we sealed a date. Among all girls I’ve met, ba chu gives me this “butterflies in my stomach” feeling every time I am with her. When we had a date on Valentine’s Day, I thought to myself that this day couldn’t pass without me telling her how much I like her. After we went for dinner and drove around our favorite place –the West Lake, I finally got a chance to tell her that I like her. I didn’t have any response from her, and I also didn’t expect her to. But I guess I did something stupid –I told her, “I love you.” She told me jokingly, “I don’t understand everything you say.” So I asked Google Translate for help, but she would cover her ears not to hear anything. Still, I insisted and hugged her, and she didn’t mind. She held my hand and hugged me back. I told myself, this response means more than any words. I like it more than any overused phrases. Then the next day I woke up to her text message, it reads, “Magandang Umaga” which means “Good Morning” in Filipino. To which I readily responded, “Maganda ka pa sa umaga” meaning, “you’re more beautiful than the morning.” Then she immediately told me, “About last night… you told me you like me. I like you too.” A few seconds later, “but I cannot love” she added. I just told her not to worry because I’m not in a hurry to put any labels on what we have, that I just want us to enjoy each other’s company and to know each other more. True enough, we had quality time together.

We hang out a lot, have lunch together, dinner together, milk tea together, satisfy cravings together. I was literally just one call away for her. While I am too lazy to make lunch for myself, I would be so eager to bring her food when she’s hungry just so I can see her, make her smile. I love to make her happy and I never grew tired doing that. But suddenly, she has this habit to just disappear. She will shut down social media and not respond to any messages, not just for days but sometimes, for months. And until now, she would just send me a message when she wants to. Suddenly, I wasn’t as eager as I was before. Probably because I know sooner or later she’ll disappear yet again and every time she does that, I kind of have a little heartbreak. To be honest, I still do.

The Artist
Sometime when ba chu left me (for the Nth time), I threw myself away to try my luck and meet other girls. So my “les” apps were active again and I was able to meet this girl. She is an artist, creative and very talented. She draws well, sings well, and can play instruments. Most of all, she can speak decent English (sigh of relief). I thought if I date this girl, we can understand each other better. True enough, we did, but it was short-lived. She lives in Vinh Phuc and I live in Hanoi but I didn’t care about the distance. One night, I just decided to drive my motorbike to her place, alone. I only relied on Waze and I was happy that this crazy idea crossed my mind. As I arrived at her house, I was welcomed with a dinner with her family. At that time, I was hopeful, maybe we have a chance. Not so long after, she became my girlfriend. Some kilometers apart weren’t really an issue because she would visit me and I would drive to her once in a while. We helped each other through some tough times but it ended prematurely when her mom found out our relationship. That sudden turn of events came after we met each other’s friends and she almost introduced me to her community. Then the next day she ignored me. Told me it wasn’t my fault but hers, that her mom saw a photo of us kissing, she was scolded and told her to forget about me and just focus on her studies. Being a college student who still relies on her parents, she did as she was told. Despite this sudden breakup, we remained friends though.

After my experience with ba chu and the artist, I told myself not to fall in love easily and just mingle with girls, flirt a little just to spare myself from sadness, loneliness and boredom. So did I. I had dates almost every night possible. I met some interesting girls, but most of them are good until they open they speak with me in person. Communication was really a problem. I often have dates where I can count the words we say verbally, because most of the time we “type” just so we can understand each other. Some girls can speak good English because they have been on Tinder long enough (and probably met a number of foreign men already), but most of them were just “bi-curious” and not really lesbians. They just fancy the idea of being pampered by another girl, being with another girl, hold hands in public and whatsoever. I was really frustrated that I asked my Vietnamese roommate to find me a decent girl for me to date. She accepted to play cupid for me. She posted something on a Vietnamese Lesbian forum and screened the girls who would respond to her post before she would let them talk to me. She helped me save some time trying to figure out these girls on my own. She would know who doesn’t speak English, who are just curious, who are really interested to meet me. So she would only forward to me numbers or profiles of girls who would fit criteria we set and that is how I met “cung.”

“Cung”
It was just another day, another profile from my roommate for me to check. Cung messaged me on Facebook and we got to know each other. She told me she’s a bisexual and she has a son – that’s 2 red flags in a row. I learned my lesson dating bisexuals, plus she has a kid. I thought that it will be a lot difficult to date this girl than the other girls I’ve met. Not to mention she lives in the South, that’s 3rd red flag. But because she seems so interested with me and she can talk to me in English, we got along well. I told her my experiences in love and she told me about hers. She knew how ba chu drove me crazy and how broken I was when I lost 6 years of my life with a wrong person. I’ve never let my guard down like that unless with a friend. So I thought we would just be friends. We were for some time but I don’t know what happened that we suddenly became more than that. We started caring so much for each other and exchanging “I love you.” I meant it, but I am not sure if she did.

The next thing I know, it was my birthday and a bouquet of flowers with a birthday cake arrived at my door. It was from her. I was ecstatic as nobody did that for me ever yet. It made me fall for her more. Then came 2017, her birthday is a few days away from Tet holiday. I decided to take a shot of destiny and planned a trip to see her. She never really told me where she lives, I believed that she’s in Can Tho but she actually lives in Kien Giang. I was surprised when she gave me her postal address when I told her I want to send her a gift for her birthday. She didn’t have any idea that the gift I was sending her was myself. Here comes a few days before Tet holiday and I flew to the South.

When I was in HCMC, a friend of mine tried to help me figure out how to go to cung’s place. It was as difficult as I only knew her postal address and the name of her former school where she plays volleyball every afternoon. So the plan was, go to the nearest place to the post office and then try to find this school to see her while she plays volleyball. I was ready to gamble my safety and my emotions. With that plan laid out, I had to take the 7 am bus from HCMC to arrive in Kien Giang in the afternoon so I will have time to find her before sundown. I was so stupid though, I missed it. The next option is a 2pm bus. I still took it without hesitation. Taking 2 pm bus means I would arrive in Kien Giang between 9 to 10 pm that made the search for her, a task close to impossible. I still didn’t lose hope. I only have this in mind: I came this far for her, I will find her.

While lying anxious on the bus, rain poured heavily and I had to make SOS to my friends, to help me find a place to stay when I arrive in Kien Giang as I don’t have any idea about the place. My plan B was to spend that night in a hotel near the bus station where I can take another ride going to her town which takes more than an hour. I’m unlucky enough that friends couldn’t find a place for me to stay and they told me to tell her that I was on my way to KG. That was my last option. I took it with a heavy heart because I know she doesn’t like surprises. Left with no choice, I revealed to her that I was on my way to KG and I will need her help to find me a place to stay. At first, she was mad at me. She didn’t respond to my messages, didn’t pick up my calls, ignored me for about 2 hours and I was about to give up and call this mission a failure. Then I finally got a message from her, it was an address of a hotel. She told me she already arranged a room for me and they are already waiting for me to arrive. I was relieved big time! She admitted that what I did anger her because I’ve put myself in danger, but at the same time, made her love me even more. I stayed in this hotel, and I finally met cung for the first time the next day. I couldn’t contain my happiness! She’s finally in my arms. I can finally kiss her. Look at her smile. For the first time in a long while, I was happy and I am sharing this happiness with someone. We spent quality time together for a day and a night until she had to go home and I went back to HCMC. A few days later, I was spending Tet holiday with her and her son. We spent almost a week together in HCMC and Can Tho combined. Suddenly, after the holiday, I must come back to Hanoi and do my things.
One day, I thought, we were dating for quite some time but I still barely know cung because she will not open up to me often. I didn’t know the story behind her son. I didn’t know why she told me she lives in Can Tho and not in Kien Giang. I wanted to know this person a little bit more but she always refused to tell me about her past. The only thing she told me is that she only fell in love with a girl once –with her best friend. Knowing this, I was really furious when I found out that she spent Valentine’s Day with her best friend while I spent it alone in my room waiting for her messages or call whole day and night. She was also mad at me for being mad at her and she thought I will never understand her. Hmm… how can I understand something that I didn’t have any knowledge of? But because I really love her, I just moved on and planned another trip to see her on the next holiday. Fast forward to that, we spent a week together in Can Tho 2 months later. I was able to meet some of her friends and her sister. We had an amazing time and for once I thought we were moving forward when we talked about moving together in Can Tho.
We made plans and the first thing I did when I get back to Hanoi was to find a job in Can Tho. I did, and a few weeks later, I was all set to move. The only missing puzzle piece was her. So I told her that I was ready that my only worry at that moment was her. As for myself, I was ready to leave my second home to start from scratch again. I didn’t know anyone in CT and the only reason I had to move there was her. You can call me crazy all you want but sometimes we become a fool when we fall in love. When I told her about my worries, I was thinking she would assure me that we won’t have any problem and if we encounter any, we face it together, but I was wrong. Her response was, “don’t move to Can Tho anymore” and told me that everything she told me was a lie. That she didn’t really intend to live with me and she only said that just to make me happy, and worse, she has no intentions of coming out so there is no future for both of us. I honestly didn’t know how to react to that. I had everything ready but in a blink of an eye, I lost it again. She set me free, insisting that I should be happy with someone else. She even thinks that her coming to my life was a terrible mistake that should’ve not happened in the first place. I was sad and mad at the same time. Mad at her and mad at myself for being so stupid.

What did I learn after all?
With all these things that happened in my first 2 years living in Vietnam, I learned that (this is just my opinion based on my experience; you can correct me if I’m wrong):

1. Not all Viet girls who call themselves lesbians are real lesbians, half of them are bisexuals.

2. Not all girls who identify themselves as bisexual are really bisexual, most of them are straight girls who has this intense curiosity or desire of being with another girl (for a while, they still want to end up with a guy).

3. Not all girls who dress like a tomboy are lesbians. Most of them just find it cool to dress like that.

4. VIETNAMESE GIRLS LOVE ATTENTION. I couldn’t emphasize it enough! Attention from boys will flatter them while attention from another girl will make them feel special. They will body shame themselves to fish for compliments and upload beautiful photos of them captioning it “ugly” just for you to tell them they are beautiful.

5. Not all lesbians are looking for long-term relationships. Some of them still believe that they still need to marry a man someday, because this is what Vietnamese culture dictates them.

6. Not all girls who will tell you they like you really mean it. Sometimes, they just like what I said in no. 4, attention. The attention you give them and the attention they get when they display your hands linked together in public.

7. Not all girls will say what they mean and will mean what they say. Sometimes they will tell you things just to please you or not tell you things so you won’t be unpleased.

8. Not every Vietnamese girl who looks conservative is really conservative. Some of them, when they get to know you, they will be so much more aggressive than you think they could be.

7. Not everything in this list might be true or enough to say that dating a Vietnamese les is tough but it’s a challenge that could be 10X more difficult than a “normal” male-female Viet – Tay dating.

8. Not all bad experiences can cut hopes that someday the right person will come. These “wrong” persons came along to help you prepare emotionally for that day you meet “ the one.” Just like how you have to dig inches of mud just to reach the gold.

*Cung = cưng = honey/dear
*Ba chu = bà chủ = master
*All names have not been included to protect identities.

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Read more Shades of Love here

The post The “Roller Coaster” Love Ride of a Lesbian Expat in Vietnam appeared first on Maze Vietnam.

Cross-cultural relationships have been on the common trail in a burgeoning country of global integration like Vietnam. The cross-cultural relationships inconceivably bring a ton of new but beautiful and eye-opening experiences. We just cannot get the full idea of it if we are never in that international love boat.

We often catch sight of intercultural couples with Vietnamese girls hand in hand with Western guys whenever we are in the bar sipping some beers up to the brim or in the middle of all avenues in Hanoi Old Quarter or Downtown Saigon. However, rarely could we find a couple of Trai Viet, Gai Tay, which literally means a Viet man and foreign woman couple. Whether you are a Vietnamese or an expat, I’m pretty sure you might wonder what it’s like to be with a Viet man or the other way round, a Tay girl. You definitely have your own taste when it comes to dating. But you tap onto this article, you are at least keen on the idea of doing so.

So what it’s like to date a Vietnamese man? What are the great things and challenges that a Trai Viet, Gai Tay couple may have? Let’s discover all through a quick but awesome interview I had with Jade T., a beautiful and friendly 25-year-old Australian teacher who has been living in Hanoi for 4 years. She and her boyfriend, a Hanoian man, have been in a relationship for over 2 years!

Now, let’s talk with her!

Could you share your “How we met” story with us? 

We met on the 13th of June, 2015, when a crazy super storm hit Hanoi. He picked me up in the taxi a minute before the heavy rain and wind hit, and during the whole taxi ride and date night we talked and talked and barely noticed the storm. We walked around later amongst the fallen trees and felt totally at ease with each other, the ‘vibe’ was so great.

What was your first impression of him?

Friendly, earnest, polite and with a beautiful smile that made him so much more handsome. I can still clearly remember the way he smiled at me when I walked out of my alley to meet him at the taxi. Instant attraction and all my nervousness disappeared.

When you two were together, how did your and his families react to this cross-cultural relationship?

Very early in the relationship, his parents made it clear that if he chose to marry a “Tay” they would support him. They showed me nothing but kindness, and continue to do so today. My parents love him and would never have an issue with me dating cross-culturally.

What differences would you find between Asian (Vietnamese) and Western men as well as Asian and Western customs/cultures?

We have differing views on some topics, and I feel he’s far more traditional than me. I am a lot more liberal and open to new ideas regarding family structure and career. He was also a lot faster in saying “I love you” than expected, though I’m not sure if that’s cultural or personal. He is a lot more shy in public than I am, and it took a long time before he was comfortable with physical affection in public. In my culture, it’s very normal to kiss in public, especially when you say goodbye to your partner. Here, not so much, and depending on the situation (how many people are looking) I might just squeeze his hand to say goodbye to prevent him from feeling uncomfortable.

Is there any language barrier between you and your partner sometime? 

He’s lived abroad for eight years, his English is better than mine most of the time, so not really. Like any of us, he makes mistakes and asks me to correct them when they arise. It’s great to have a partner who can be your translator too, especially in Vietnam where there are many communication boundaries for foreigners.

Have you and your partner ever encountered misunderstandings in cross-cultural communication? What was it like? 

Not really, but sometimes he can be too ‘straight to the point’ about sensitive topics and I need to remind him to speak more gently. We argued in the beginning when he wanted to playfully ‘tease’ me and I wasn’t in the mood to joke, for example. I sense that teasing is a cute and flirtatious thing to do here, but I don’t enjoy it much at all.

Before having a Vietnamese boyfriend, did you have any predictable depictions of cross-cultural romance? If yes, how do they relate to the reality?

I’d never really considered it before, but I must say I was pleasantly surprised every step of the way. Our relationship gets easier as time goes by, I feel, and I secretly love it when taxi drivers or acquaintances say “REALLY?! You have a Vietnamese boyfriend?!” I guess most people aren’t used to seeing couples like that here. We draw a lot of attention when we hold hands together in public sometimes.

What has been the most memorable moment in your relationship with him?

Probably the day we met, and when we surprised my family in Australia on Christmas Eve and he was able to meet my entire extended family. I felt he really fit in and was so fantastic at getting to know everyone, even though he tends to be shy. Everyone really enjoyed meeting him and they always ask me what he’s up to now.

Do you have any future plans or dreams with him that you would like to share with us?

I’m definitely comfortable with the idea of spending my life with him, so long as we keep supporting each other and helping each other grow. Babies are a topic of interest, particularly with his parents who would absolutely love another grandchild.

Is there anything else you would like others to know that we have not included here?

I think if there was anyone who was unsure about dating outside their own nationality, I would strongly suggest giving it a try. You’ll learn so much, learn more about the world and about humanity in general, we’re all so different but we all need love. Why not open yourself up to that?

I highly appreciate the time that Jade spent with me sharing about her true love story. My team – Maze Vietnam and I would like to take a moment to thank her very much!

How about our readers? Are you ready to give it a try? Are you ready to head all the way from up to the North through the Central then down to the South to find a Vietnamese partner?

To learn more about Jade and her days in Vietnam, you can visit her blog here

To have your story published on our website, please pm Facebook us or email to: mazevietnam.info@gmail.com

The post So You Wanna Date a Vietnamese Man? Read This First! appeared first on Maze Vietnam.